A New Year, A New Word

Another year is upon us. I can hardly believe that it will be 2020!!!! I remember working for Hewlett Packard during the Y2K event that was so NOT an event! They did pay double-time to work that night when nothing happened, so no complaints from me.

And now, two decades and a lot of life, dare I say “lives,”?, have come and gone. We are now on the precipice of a new year and a new decade. I’m a fan of new starts or beginnings. While I don’t necessarily go looking for them, it seems my life choices illustrate my comfortability with beginning again.

I can remember being in the middle of my second (and longest) marriage and feeling depressed upon the recognition of where I stood. You see, when you begin your young adult life there are so very many choices ahead of you. Around every corner there is a fork in the road and while it can be intimidating to select and choose what you deem to be “the correct path,” there is a thrill in the choosing. So many opportunities. What shall you study or learn towards a career? Where will you go to university? Who will you meet and marry? Where will you buy a home? Or will you rent a trendy loft apartment in the big city? What kind of car will you drive? Will you relocate? Within the U.S.? Or will you go abroad? Which company will employ you? Or will you start your own business? Will you have a child? Or children? Will you go on to get an advanced degree? Yes, so very many forks in the road when you are 20 or even 25 years old.

But there I was in my mid 30s and it felt as if I’d made all my choices and there were no more forks in the road.  Was it all over? Was there nothing more to be excited about? 

As you know now, if you know me, I’ve made a number of U-turns along the road since that time of my life. Between that seemingly dead-end moment of my life and now there was the Mongolia chapter. I’ve been in Turkey not quite a year and a half and already three friends from my time living in Ulaanbaatar have come to visit me in Izmir. Mongolia was no small chapter and it is what made it possible for me to land here. My life is good and rich and diverse–filled with meaningful work and beautiful friends. 

Last year I chose the word “Enjoy” as my word for the year. This is a ritual I’ve been participating in for nearly a decade. There couldn’t have been a more perfect word than “Enjoy!” I’m confident I gave it my full attention and did my best to seek and embrace enjoyment and joy at every juncture. 

I added new countries to my passport–UAE, Ukraine, and Greece. I visited new cities–Dubrovnik in Croatia and Bergama and Ayvalık in Turkey. I spent time with family in the UAE, in Turkey, and in the U.S. I returned again to Sarajevo (a favorite place in the world) and attended the Sarajevo Film Festival where I made a dear new friend. I returned to Colorado for the first time in four years and had a lovely reunion with so many friends and former colleagues. I got new tattoos and tasted so many new foods and drank wonderful wines accompanied by so many deep conversations. Yes, I lived ENJOY this year!

And though 2019 is coming to a close, I have no intention of forgetting this word and the impact it had on my life and choices this year. I will choose a new word, but I will also keep ENJOY with me at all times. Remember, I tattooed her on my right wrist. This way whenever I have to make a choice and feel unsure, I can glance down and remind myself what I wish to do. And the choosing doesn’t seem so difficult.

But now is the time to begin again with a new word. I have spent a lot of time in recent weeks considering a plethora of words. I’ve read definitions and sought synonyms. It has not been an easy task. But last week I saw and felt clearly what my word for 2020 will be: PROVOKE, from the Latin prōvocāre.

Primarily I am focusing on the following three definitions of the verb provoke:

• • • to call forth;
    • to stir up; and
    • to challenge.

Ultimately it is about causing something to come into action or existence. I both want to BE provoked in this next year, as well as to also provoke others. I know that provoke is commonly used in or with a negative connotation; I want to see it positively. Sometimes we have to be challenged by a person, by a period in life, by a circumstance, in order to be forced beyond our comfort zone or complacency. I am excited to see in what ways I may find myself provoked. I’ve had a year of enjoyment and rest and ease. Now it’s time to discover in what areas or ways I wish to grow or expand or enrich myself. Keeping Enjoy! in my back pocket, I am ready for that which 2020 has in store for me.

Anyone out there want to join me in this ritual? I have no real advice on choosing your word. It may come to you immediately, or it may take some time. I know there was a year or two when I didn’t have a word until mid or late January. But I have always known it when it was ready to be known. If you want to join me, please comment here and share your word. We can stay in conversation throughout the year and see what you think or discover about yourself and others in the process. 🙂  

I wish each of you a very happy new year filled with health, gratitude, and love!